March 10, 2009...1:59 am

The power of likeability

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I just saw Frost/Nixon. It’s a brilliant, chilling insight into power and ambition. What struck me was the degree of self-awareness Nixon had. Albeit, this is a fictionalized account;  who knows exactly what went on in Nixon’s mind. But in the film, he’s portrayed as a worthy opponent, a crafty guy who is keenly aware of his own ambition and  thirst for power and knows what he needs to do to win. And yet he’s trumped by Frost, an unlikely winner, a breezy, somewhat superficial talk show host. But what Frost has going for him is his likeability. He’s affable, charming, and easy going. At first, it appears he’s easy prey for the cunning Nixon, but in the end, we have the ultimate story of a nice guy finishing first.

Likeability in my view is underestimated as a form of power, and yet, I think the ability to get along with people trumps just about every form of power. Friends, connections and being able to get along well with others is the ultimate affirmative action. In a Harvard Business Review article, (June 2005) called Competent Jerks, Loveable Fools and the Formation of Social Networks, a study found that likeability is so key, that people are more likely to ask for help from someone who may not know the answer but is likeable, than from someone who is more likely to know the answer but isn’t likeable. In Frost/Nixon the power of likeability is maginified by its contrast to the opposite: Nixon’s tragic flaw of not being able to manage social interaction, of creating conflict rather than smoothing ruffled feathers, as Frost did so brilliantly.

2 Comments

  • I was just cleaning up my desk and came across something from your blog I
    printed and routed around last spring. It made me want to visit your blog
    again. So, I did.

    I wanted to respond to your comments about Nixon’s awareness (I could not
    sign in for some reason, so here are my thoughts, memories really). I was 16
    years old and in the Canadian wilderness having the time of my life at
    Outward Bound, when Nixon resigned. When i came home, it wasn’t just small
    changes i saw in my personal world that marked my absense but a big change
    in the biggest entity I was connected to, the US govenment.

    I have not really been a very political sort but I do recall when Nixon
    wrote his autobiography years after he resigned, i read a review of it or an
    interview with him. I remember being completely taken by his humility and
    sense of contrition. I had very simplistic views of politics and little
    appreciation for partisan politics or how they might have impacted my
    opinion of him which was condemning in an adolescent sort of way. But in
    just reading that article, I felt a huge sense of compassion for him and
    respect for his ability to come forward in public and acknowledge his sense
    of responsibility and the impact his action had had on the country.

    It opened my eyes to what it meant to be a public servants and gave me
    compassion for their vulnerability and culpability. It gave me a sense of
    respect for them as human beings with short-comings, imperfect judgement and
    also incredible courage to stand for so much and to be part of such a huge
    and complex organization, finding their way through it, one career step at a
    time, propelled by some mix of motives for power and for good, I think.

    It is interesting, I will have to see the movie to see what other memories
    it stirs. Thanks for your blog and the stroll down memory lane. Hope this
    falls within the scope of what people do when they respond to a blog. It’s
    my first time!

    CT

  • Thanks Cindy. The sense of humanness in public servants, and what you call a ‘mix of motives for power and good’ is one of the things I’m aiming to explore in this blog. Getting past the deification of leaders, whether it means we elevate them unrealistically or criticize them for failing our expectations, the flip side of their humanness is our empowerment.


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